Welcome to Somatic Sparkle :)

Thank you for reading Evi's Substack.

Today I took my second Feldenkrais Class. I turned my Zoom camera off, not because I wasn’t present—but because I was. Because, like my first class, this one made me cry. Not the kind of crying that means something is wrong. The kind of crying that means something is releasing.

I’ve spent most of my life in performance mode. I was a college volleyball player, the girl with the scoliosis brace, the one who wasn’t supposed to walk because of my strange birth story that had my knee facing backward. They twisted and splinted me straight month by month. I became an athlete anyway.

So it is a curious, sacred thing to find myself now, decades later, lying on a mat in my home, listening to a voice on my computer guide me through barely perceptible movements—like that of a baby rocking on the ground and having my hip open spontaneously, like a door I didn’t know was locked. Like it just decided to let go.

This is somatic magic. And I’m not here to explain it or prove it. I’m here to witness it.

I’m writing this because something is healing. Not in a linear way. Not in a “goal-met” kind of way. But in a tearful, curious, quiet kind of way. I wonder if I’ve just been living in fight/flight/fawn mode for awhile now. Today, and many days recently, my body said: rest. digest. you're safe.

I bet some of you right now are like, “What is she talking about?’ You subscribed to my stuff after a teacher training, or you were curious about my Tell Me a Teaching Story Podcast, and some of you even go WAY back to when I was writing blogs at Gratitude Gal. If you are into creativity, you know these things come in waves, and I think I am shifting into my Somatics “era.”

When I told some friends at bookclub about these experiences, they got curious. And when I told another friend about my exploration, she said it made her want to be more adventurous in her own life … so I want to write about it. I’ve been dabbling in somatic practices for a little under a year, after AI, of all things, suggested one too many times that I go see a somatic therapist. “What even is that?” I thought, and started Googling. What has unfolded since then has been so intriguing. It’s got me reading new things, doing new things, and I think most importantly, feeling new things. I’ve spent a lot of my life in my head, being a thinker, an academic, reading all the books. Somatics is all about the body, about the felt sense of day to day life, of emotion. It's like I'm learning a new language where the vocabulary expresses emotions like love, joy, and even some pain. After things move through, I feel clearer somehow, like my body has cleared a stuffy nose I didn't know was blocked.

And alongside this exploration, I feel my love of writing tap-tap-tapping me on the shoulder. Hey, it seems to say, you should write about this. And I’ve put it off and put it off, as some of this has felt fiercely private, holy, and even a little too weird to talk about, but today the words are coming…

So, I am signing a contract with myself (so to speak) to post on Substack for a year, once a month, maybe more. The crazy thing is I hadn’t even heard of Substack until a few weeks ago when my sister told me about it. I was expressing my frustration with social media to her. I am noticing more the feel of things, and for me it has started to feel so polar, so tired, like a cesspool of something that I want to wash off my skin. Plus, I’m just regular old annoyed with all the adds.

Substack has some paid features, but I’m not using them just yet. For this year, this is a free space to see what unfolds. To be honest, I don’t have the time or bandwidth to write enough to charge anyone, but I do feel like God made me with an abundance of words that best come out in writing, whether here on the keyboard or in one of my notebooks.

So, I’m gonna write when the writing comes and worry less about who is reading. That worry seems to stop me short. I just met a new friend, Haley online who shares inspiring, beautiful things so often you can depend on it, and I find it catalyzing to me. I want to put more good vibe stuff out into the world. Evi has always had some sparkle to share 🌀. Anyway, here’s what Somatic Sparkle will be about:

1. Somatics. This stuff is magic and weird, and I am curious to explore more. My somatic therapist and I think that my back brace era shut down some of my inner felt sense. I was uncomfortable all the time, so my oh-so-smart nervous system hit the mute button. Putting things back online has been emotional and hard and beautiful, and I need to process these experiences somehow. One of my teacher mentors said that real learning happens in a spiral: experience and reflect, then experience and reflect again. I am going on a pilgrimage/vision quest around somatic practices this year. I don’t know what will unfold, but I’m curious and planning to write about it.

2. Things I VALUE. Recently I read that you should be able to list your values and then draw lines from them to actual things you are DOING in your life. Um… the thing I value most is creativity, and yet so much of mine lives in a pile of spiral notebooks that no one ever sees. So, my intention is to take action around these things I value most: authenticity, adventure, balance, creativity, play, spirituality, wisdom, growth & courage... that last one is a growth edge for me. Cheers to being courageous in 2025/2026!

3. Connection. I love writing. I love how it connects us. Even with AI–and maybe especially because of AI, I claim it as a a tiny rebellion to still invest time in this craft I love to teach, writing. My family, friends, and students are the best part of my life, and I love to connect to them in written words. Some people knit. Some sew and bake. I write. And even though I am so curious and interested in all things AI, I want to write things with my brain and my heart and my hands, with a keyboard or a good ole spiral notebook. If these new technologies are going to make us more human, not less, we’ve gotta be about the work of spending time doing the things that make us feel human. For me, that is writing. Full transparency, I’m gonna use AI for proofreading and brainstorming. You can use AI to get out of work, or you can use AI to get into it. So, as I write here at Somatic Sparkle, these will be my words, hopefully for someone to read.

I don’t know where this is all going, and I love that. Julia Cambron, one of my favorite writers, encourages a weekly Artist Date, where you go on a solo expedition without much of a plan, open to serendipity and spontaneity. When I make time for it, Deep Goodness surprises me again and again with its generosity, playfulness, and color.

I want to write more about that, because every time I experience it, every time I feel it, it spills over like a cup too full. As I write that, a memory jumps into my mind of my son Oliver when he was just old enough to start eating solid foods. I gave him this chocolate bunny cereal, and his little eyes lit up when he ate the first one. His impulse on the next one wasn’t to gobble it up, but to push it to my mouth, so we could taste the goodness together. ❤️

So, if you’re joining in on this Somatic Sparkle journey, buckle up because I’ve got plans for a trip to New York, a stand-up comedy class, and other adventures I don’t even know about yet. (Send me your ideas!)

So…if you’re still reading, big ole thanks to you, Dear One. To join in the fun in a more concrete way, paint those fingernails with some glitter this week and do something that makes you FEEL alive. If you’re not the painting nails type, maybe you can connect to the sparkle through my dear friend, Sara’s story. She was canoeing with her nephew who said, “I want to go to that sparkly place,” pointing to where the sun hit the water. I love that story, especially since you can’t ever really get there, to that sparkle place on the water, it’s more about an orientation, about pointing yourself toward the light. Either way–nails or not, I would love to see a pic of your sparkle and hear about your mini-adventure, even if it’s just driving a new route on your way home from work.

There is a sparkle that comes with you just being you. Cheers to that on this somewhat cloudy and wet, green-green day after some early spring rains in the spring of 2025.

I’m glad you’re here. - Evi (like Chevy)

p.s. Sharing my writing makes me about 87% more anxious than keeping it safely tucked in my notebook, but thanks to a Catalyst grant (and some encouragement from Ralph), I’m learning to let it ripple out into the world. Part of my plan this year includes hiding tiny substack QR codes that lead to this in bookstores wherever I travel — a low-key scavenger hunt for sparkly souls. ✨ If you know someone who might enjoy this too, feel free to forward it along. Thanks for being part of the sparkle.